


A Challenging Day

by zuotian



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, Arguing, Conflict Resolution, Disability, Domestic, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Old Married Couple, Post-Canon, References to Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-27
Updated: 2019-03-27
Packaged: 2019-12-18 16:47:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18253880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zuotian/pseuds/zuotian
Summary: Kakashi is trying to enjoy his retirement the best he can, with one problem: a hyperactive husband who won't slow down to match their new pace of life. Kakashi proposes a challenge which forces Gai to reckon with his age and physical disability. A lighthearted gamble unravels into a larger disagreement, and they both come to a compromise regarding their relationship.





	A Challenging Day

**Author's Note:**

> hello, i'm back. i've been working on this on and off for about a month. i went on a trip over spring break, then when i came back i got bombarded with homework. still am, so i really shouldn't have stayed up late finishing this, but it'd been so long since i had a good writing session i couldn't stop myself. plus i really wanted to post this after my absence. 
> 
> i initially meant for this to be pure fluff, but that didn't happen - for the better, i think. regarding an aspect of the fic which you will find toward the end, i didn't mean any ill intent regarding kakashi's behavior, and neither did kakashi himself. but i think it's important to recognize the struggles caretakers face as well as those whom they take care of. hope it doesn't come off offensively, i tried the best i could. 
> 
> original characters are pretty minor and nameless besides an old lady neighbor of gai and kakashi's. i wanted to throw her in the show their distance from shinobi life as of now. her name means "long lived child" according to the website i found it from.
> 
> let me know what you think, please leave a comment and kudos! i tried to push myself to "beef up" my prose so to speak, and i think i did alright. i hope you can tell the difference from my previous fics. brownie points for whoever catches the vague star wars reference i couldn't help throwing in.

Three months ago Kakashi rescinded the hat to Naruto. He never wanted the responsibility to begin with. It still creeped him out to see his own giant face staring down upon the village beside his more qualified predecessors, but despite this constant reminder his duties to Konoha had been paid in full. There was nothing left to ask of him, and he had nothing left to give. 

 

Retirement felt good. As the village acclimated to Naruto’s enthusiastic leadership Kakashi acclimated to a new dimension in his relationship with Gai, who by then had finished most of his rehabilitation. Two celebrated war veterans considered the top shinobi of their generation, they could finally take it easy after a collective lifetime of blood, death, and hardship. 

 

Kakashi never stayed at the Hokage residency often, so when the time came he moved into Gai’s place with ease. The one-story house sat on the edge of Konoha in a quiet district far from the village’s loud center, favored by veterans and civilian families alike. Homes were spread out, each with their own substantial yards. Trees and flowers grew freely along wide roads, uncrowded by narrow streets, pop-up vendors, and cramped apartment complexes. 

 

Overall, it was the perfect place to be unabashedly lazy, and Kakashi was definitely out of practice. For awhile he did nothing but sleep and eat and trap Gai in bed. It was apparent that Gai had a more difficult time adjusting, however. His leg made everything worse. He trained hard, doubled his physical therapy to the point of exhaustion, and insisted on fixing things around the house without help. 

 

Sakura told Kakashi once, after his retirement, that Gai frequently hurt himself and simply declined to inform Kakashi, but Kakashi didn’t give it too much thought because it didn’t matter anymore. Gai still wanted to prove his usefulness - as if volunteering his life for Konoha wasn’t enough - and Kakashi figured his term as Hokage had something to do with it. They always needed to be equals, but now that he was retired Gai had no reason not to be equally lazy. 

 

Except teaching Maito Gai how to relax was like teaching a fish how to bark - an impossible fight against nature. Good thing Kakashi now had all the time in the world. 

 

A genin team, Konoha’s destruction, and war hadn’t disrupted Gai’s routine - so chronic pain and a bad leg wouldn’t either. Gai got up every morning at 5 AM. He tried his best to be quiet, but as always Kakashi awoke to rustling sheets and soft curses while Gai transferred from their bed to his wheelchair and put on a tank top and shorts. Kakashi laid still, pretending to be asleep, even when Gai gently brushed hair from his face and watched him for a moment. 

 

Once Gai was gone Kakashi opened his eyes and stared at the empty space beside him. Half-awake, he listened to the sounds of Gai cracking two raw eggs over his mouth, then a heavy thump indicating Gai was on the kitchen floor doing his prescribed stretches far longer than necessary. Gai did not understand that pushing himself only exacerbated his injuries; but that was part of his nature.

 

Afterward, Gai went out to the porch to curl weights in the crisp morning air. His upper body had always been fit, but since the injury he’d channeled all of his exercise into his arms and chest. His biceps were the size of logs and his pectorals jutted out from his torso. Kakashi kept hoping for the day when Gai’s muscles could no longer be contained and he’d be forced to go around shirtless.

 

He waited until Gai came back in from the porch before getting out of bed. Gai liked to “surprise” him with breakfast, and he liked to indulge his efforts. He padded out to the kitchen maskless and pantless in one of Gai’s t-shirts, a new look he’d been sporting for the past three months. 

 

Gai looked up from the bacon sizzling on the stovetop. “Rival,” he crowed jovially, but Kakashi could see the thinly veiled pain behind his cheery disposition. “Put on some clothes, would you?”

 

“Nah,” Kakashi took the spatula from his hand, “I’m good. How about you go take a bath? You stink.” 

 

Gai wheeled backward to give him room, but stayed put. He did not enjoy being bossed around and predictably ignored Kakashi’s suggestion. “I reek with the stench of physical prowess!”

 

“Not the kind I prefer.” Grease bounced off the pan; Kakashi dodged it and sat down in Gai’s lap, consciously keeping his weight on Gai’s good leg. “Oh look, you saved me.” 

 

Gai remained still, his eyes narrowed. Everything Kakashi did was some double entendre. “What do you want?” 

 

Kakashi reached forward to turn off the stove and the abandoned bacon quieted. “Nothing.” 

 

“Right,” Gai said, unconvinced. “You never have an ulterior motive.” 

 

Kakashi settled back against his chest. “That’s correct.”

 

“Especially when you prostrate yourself before me,” Gai continued, glancing down at Kakashi’s legs, “half-naked.”

 

“This isn’t a bribe. I just figured you’d need extra persuasion.” 

 

Gai didn’t inform him that was the definition of bribery and instead asked, “To do what?” He tried pushing Kakashi away to get a better look at him, but Kakashi didn’t budge so he gave up. “You don’t need to persuade me to do anything! Just ask.” 

 

“Can you go back to bed?” Kakashi requested.

 

Gai paused. His overexerted muscles were trembling, and a sheen coat of sweat covered his forehead, gluing wisps of hair to his temples. He chuckled, oddly subdued. “What about breakfast?” 

 

Kakashi needed to hedge this very carefully. Any small mistake would set Gai off and he’d probably do five thousand handstands just to prove he could. “I’m not really hungry right now.” If he made this about himself, Gai would be more likely to cooperate. “And I’m tired. Lay down with me - at least until I fall back asleep.” 

 

“Kakashi…” Gai smirked, splayed one of his big hands at the small of Kakashi’s back. “You are so dramatic! Of course I will. Why didn’t you just ask me that to begin with?” 

 

“It’s not as fun,” Kakashi shrugged. He pulled his legs up, fully seated in Gai’s lap now, uncomfortably bracketed by the sides of the wheelchair. The days of Gai carrying him in random challenges, in displays of affection, or just to piss him off were over - this was as close as they’d get. “You deserve a little torture.” 

 

“Torture!” Gai scoffed, but tightened his hold on Kakashi just the same. “It’s torturous enough being with you.” 

 

“You like it,” Kakashi said. 

 

“Maybe,” Gai smiled sardonically - new and old wrinkles creased with historied scars, all of which Kakashi catalogued a long time ago, “and I am a fool for it.”

 

“Well, who’s worse,” Kakashi asked, “the fool or the fool who loves him?”

 

“Oh - be quiet. I thought you were tired!” 

 

“I am.” 

 

“You don’t sound like it.” Gai let go of him and laughed. “I should make you walk to bed!” 

 

“No,” Kakashi refused, hugging Gai tightly. “I wouldn’t make it. You promised you’d escort me to our chambers.”

 

“I promised nothing of the sort,” Gai said, but after Kakashi stared at him for a moment he relented with a deep sigh. “Fine!” 

 

They maneuvered down the hall. Kakashi ignored Gai’s brief, swallowed gasp of pain as they passed over the bedroom threshold. His weight was definitely upsetting Gai’s injury, but neither of them mentioned it. Gai spent every day in pain - he let Kakashi know during his initial recovery that a little extra discomfort didn’t make much difference, especially if it meant being close like this. Sometimes, Kakashi couldn’t help being selfish. 

 

Once they made it to their room Gai roughly tossed him off of his lap and onto the bed. “There you go!” 

 

Kakashi tumbled across the mattress and landed on his stomach. “Get in, then.” 

 

“Ugh.” Gai scowled, as if laying down greatly bothered him. Nonetheless, he swung onto the mattress, and dragged his bad leg up with him. “I have  _ things _ I need to do,” he said, punching the pillow beneath him into a malleable depression.

 

“Like what?” Kakashi asked, watching him with amusement. 

 

Gai dropped his head, and met Kakashi’s gaze disconcertedly. It would’ve been more effective if his messy hair hadn’t fallen over his eyes and the sunlight from the window wasn’t eclipsing his shoulder. “Like make breakfast,” he began. “There’s a leak in the roof that needs patched. Lee is coming back from a mission at noon, and I told him I’d meet him at the gates. Plus, Hisako-san across the street is having trouble with her air conditioner, and I promised I would fix it in time for her to serve me dinner.” 

 

Kakashi knew how crammed Gai kept his schedule, but hearing it listed off was something else entirely. He gently hooked his foot around Gai’s ankle and scooted forward - but Gai held his scowl even when Kakashi tried kissing it off. 

 

Kakashi leaned back and regarded him with fond exasperation. “I’m not going to starve,” he assured, “and neither of us should be getting on the roof - we can hire genin for that. Lee will be late; he always is, coming back from Sunagakure. You know him and Gaara. And what Hisako-san needs is a real repairman. Remember when you nearly burned yourself trying to fix the furnace last winter?” 

 

Gai huffed. He rolled onto his back and proceeded to argue each of Kakashi’s points, glaring at the ceiling: “First of all, dear Rival, if it weren’t for me you  _ would _ be starving. Secondly, we should not waste genin’s time with trivial matters I am capable of fixing. Thirdly, my student is a dutiful shinobi and neither he nor the Kazekage would ever let their friendship get in the way of diplomacy. And, finally, I think I am smart enough to figure out Hisako-san’s AC unit. It’s a decades old model!” 

 

Kakashi snorted, turned on his back so that his position mirrored Gai’s, and laced his hands behind his head. “Okay then. Spend your day like normal. If I’m wrong and it goes according to plan, I lose. But if I’m right and you realize all the stuff you do is a waste, I win.” 

 

“Oh!” Gai looked at him now, interested. “What are the stakes?” 

 

“I don’t know.” Kakashi thought for a second. “Winner decides on sex tonight?” 

 

“But that’s all we wager anymore,” Gai protested. He lifted himself up on his elbow to stare Kakashi down. “Pick something else!” 

 

“Do you have any better ideas,” Kakashi asked, adding, “of equal value?” 

 

“Well - “ Gai glanced away, lips pursed. “No.” 

 

Kakashi craned his neck up to connect their mouths. This time Gai surrendered and returned the kiss. 

 

“It’s settled then,” Kakashi murmured. 

 

Gai grinned. “You’re on!” 

 

Kakashi snaked around him and forced Gai onto his back. “After we sleep some more.” 

 

“But - “ 

 

“You promised,” Kakashi reminded. 

 

“You keep making up these promises,” Gai grumbled, relaxing in Kakashi’s hold. “I think I’ll start demanding written proof - documented contractual agreements.”

 

He was already drowsy again, succumbing to his body’s tiredness, and Kakashi started stroking his side. “I’ve done enough paperwork. I gave it up with my old job.” 

 

“You deserve a little torture,” Gai yawned, “with all you put me through…” 

 

“Shut up and relax,” Kakashi ordered. 

 

Gai fell back asleep within minutes. Kakashi did not, choosing to stay awake to follow the cadence of Gai’s breathing. As much as he appreciated Gai’s enthusiasm it was rare to catch his husband totally calm, and he appreciated these sights even more because he could relish in the fact that Gai wasn’t dead without interruption from the man himself. 

 

Kakashi vividly remembered the desperate battle against Madara, the moment when he locked his heart away and accepted that Gai would be gone from the world forever after a befitting last stand. He was indebted to Naruto for saving Gai’s life, but even their present Hokage’s power only went so far - the rest was all thanks to Gai. Any lesser man would’ve buckled recovering from the brink of death, but not Gai. His unstoppable determination ensured an extra lease on life, but now that same determination was going to cut his borrowed time short if he didn’t slow down. 

 

Before he could get any more sentimental, Kakashi extracted from the bed. It was a tricky process, but he switched himself out for a pillow and Gai wrapped around it, undisturbed. 

 

He put on a pair of pants to appease Gai, then went into the kitchen to finish breakfast. This was the first part of his plan. Gai always underestimated his own fatigue, before the war and certainly after it. Kakashi knew he’d be out for awhile, which gave him plenty of time to reheated the bacon and scramble some eggs. 

 

A picturesque morning formed as the rising sun streamed in through the windows and birds chirped outside. Kakashi started whistling as he poured two glasses of milk and plated the breakfast. 

 

Right on time, Gai came bustling into the room. “Rival!” His voice was far less jovial this time around.

 

Kakashi checked to see if his wheelchair left any tire tracks on the floor. “Hey.” 

 

“You duped me,” Gai accused. His place at the table was conveniently bereft of a chair. He rolled up to the spot and observed the modest spread with distaste. “What is this?” 

 

“Breakfast,” Kakashi said, sitting down next to him. 

 

“But I was supposed to make it!” 

 

“You looked so cute, though. I didn’t want to wake you up.” 

 

“You are a cheater,” Gai said. He stabbed a bacon strip with his fork and critically examined it. “This is burnt!” 

 

“Then I guess you’ll starve, huh?” 

 

“Nonsense,” Gai said. “I once lived off of ration packs for five weeks during a mission! I can stomach even your terrible cooking.” 

 

“It’s not that bad,” Kakashi informed. “I’m getting better.” 

 

Gai humphed. Chewing on the burnt bacon, he looked over his shoulder. “Where’s the coffee, then?” 

 

Kakashi placidly gestured to the counter. “Ready and waiting.”

 

Gai left the table, poured himself a cup, and took a few serious sips.

 

“How is it?” Kakashi asked.

 

“Acceptable,” Gai reluctantly concluded.

 

“The bacon’s not too bad either, if you mix it in with the eggs.” To prove his point, Kakashi spooned a forkful of food into his mouth. 

 

Gai came back to the table with his coffee mug. “I concede this round, Rival.” He brandished his silverware at Kakashi’s face. “But we still have the rest of the day!” 

 

“Right, the roof,” Kakashi said, unperturbed by the utensils weaponized against him. “Let’s go to the mission desk and see if they’ll accept our offer - ” 

 

“That’s pointless,” Gai dismissed. 

 

“- unless you’re scared,” Kakashi teased.

 

Gai’s face reddened. He dug into the rest of his breakfast with gusto, slammed back the glass of milk, and finished his coffee. “Let’s do it!” 

 

Kakashi calmly gathered their plates and cups. “You still need to shower.” 

 

“Agh!” Gai wilted, but quickly recollected himself and flew out of the kitchen. Kakashi hadn’t yet made it to the sink when he heard water running from the bathroom, and the sink basin was only half-full when Gai returned, dripping wet through a jumpsuit. 

 

“I need to do the dishes,” Kakashi said. 

 

“They can wait,” Gai insisted, hot-blooded with their challenge, “but I can’t wait to see your face when we get turned down at the mission desk! Yosh!” 

 

Laughing, he wheeled through the living room and out the front door. Kakashi donned his mask, threw on a pair of sandals, and caught up. Some might’ve said his appearance was too disheveled for the illustrious Rokudaime, but Kakashi couldn’t care less. He was retired and did whatever he wanted. If that included following an exuberant Gai around town, dressed in a t-shirt and pants each two sizes too large with his hair a mess, so be it. 

 

Evidently, the day had been a slow one. The chuunin at the mission desk was idly dozing off. Gai looked at Kakashi and waited, a smug grin on his face. 

 

Kakashi tapped the desk. “Excuse me.” 

 

The chuunin startled to attention. When she saw who was standing before her, she jumped out of her seat and saluted him. “R-Rokudaime! Gai-san! Hello!” 

 

“At ease,” Kakashi said. He still felt awkward about the propriety younger shinobi displayed around him. 

 

“Yes, sir!” She dropped her salute. “How can I help you, sir?”

 

Kakashi gestured between himself and Gai. “We’ve got a small issue. Our roof has a leak, you see. I was wondering if we could put in a request for basic maintenance, give a few genin something to do.” 

 

“Oh, of course!” She instantly flourished a request form and slid it towards him. “I’m sure any of our current genin teams would be delighted to assist you in any way possible.”

 

Gai’s grin disappeared. Kakashi ducked his head to fill out the form so Gai couldn’t see his mirthful expression. Despite the mask, Gai had been able to read him like a book for years - a simple twitch or blink would give him away. “I figured as much.” He signed his name at the bottom, then set the pen down and smiled at the chuunin. Only his eyes showed, but she bridled with joy as they crinkled. “Thank you.” 

 

“There’s no need to thank me,” she insisted. “You were at my chuunin exam! You oversaw my promotion - I should be thanking you, actually.” 

 

“Really? I thought you looked familiar.” This was a lie: Kakashi didn’t remember her at all, but didn’t want to ruin her good mood. “I’m sure you’ll be on your way to jounin soon enough. You can teach these brats you’ve been scheduling.” 

 

“I’m not ready yet, but I’ll be glad to get off desk duty.” Her eyes widened. “Not that I mind serving our village’s bureaucratic needs, it’s just - “ 

 

“No, I understand,” Kakashi interjected. “Paper pushing is so boring.”

 

“I’ll process this immediately,” she promised, and bypassed the overflowing D-rank tray to set the form aside by itself.

 

Gai entered the conversation then, waving his hands. “Don’t trouble yourself, please! We don’t want to be a bother. We can wait like everyone else.” 

 

The chuunin waved back at him, countering his humility tenfold. “That’s nonsense! The two of you have done so much for our village. It’s only right that you take first priority. There should be a team dispatched by this afternoon at the latest.” 

 

“We appreciate it,” Kakashi said, before Gai could mutter something rude and she’d misunderstand his irritation. “Thanks again.” 

 

“Certainly! If either of you ever need anything, please don’t hesitate to ask.” 

 

Kakashi smirked at Gai. “Now that you mention it, there is an elderly neighbor of ours who - “ 

 

“No,” Gai firmly objected, “that will be all.” 

 

They conducted a stare off. Meanwhile, the chuunin rubbed her neck awkwardly. “Okay then…” 

 

“Right.” Kakashi looked away from Gai. “I assume next time I see you, you’ll be a jounin?” 

 

“Oh!” Her blushed deepened. “I don’t know about that, Rokudaime.” 

 

“You can do it,” Kakashi said. In an imitation of Gai, he sent her a double thumbs up. “Believe in yourself!” 

 

She preened at his command, shoulders broadening. “I will!” 

 

Gai grabbed Kakashi’s elbow. “We should be going now,” he grit out. “Lee is returning soon, remember?” 

 

“Yeah, yeah.” Kakashi stepped back, lifted his hand in a goodbye. “See you later, future jounin.” 

 

“S-see you!” She waved enthusiastically as they left. 

 

Back in the street, Gai wound ahead of Kakashi and parked directly in front of him, arms crossed. “That  _ impression _ of yours was awful! I do not sound like that.” 

 

“I thought it was okay.” Kakashi scratched his ankle with his foot, feigning casual apathy. After decades of practice he’d made an art out of it. “What’s the score, now? With the breakfast and roof it’s two to zero, right?” 

 

“Don’t get cocky, Rival,” Gai warned. “There’s still half a day left. I can force a tie at least.” 

 

Ties between them were complicated. Kakashi used to break them with rock-paper-scissors, but after the hundredth stalemate Gai demanded they get more creative. There was no telling what he’d come up with. 

 

“Don’t get your hopes up.”

 

“Ah, but luck is on my side. I can count on my dependable student, and my own wits!” Gai tapped his temple. “Don’t underestimate me.” 

 

“I’m not.” Kakashi hadn’t made that mistake since they were kids. “You’re just wrong.” 

 

“You question my intelligence!” 

 

“No, you’re pretty smart. Just not as smart as me.” 

 

“Oh, so that’s how it is!” Gai stuffed his hands under his armpits and pouted. “Look at me, I’m Kakashi! I’m a genius! I’m so cool! Everyone else is an idiot! I was a huge loner, until Gai befriended me out of the kindness in his heart!” 

 

Kakashi tossed his head back and laughed. “Not bad.” 

 

Gai dropped the pose, started chuckling himself. “Because it’s true.” 

 

“I guess.” The last part had been accurate, at least. “Anyway,” Kakashi checked an invisible watch, “we’ve got a couple hours to kill. Want to go bother Naruto?” 

 

Gai arched an eyebrow. “You mean grace our Hokage with a cordial visit?” 

 

“Sure,” Kakashi lied, resuming his stroll, “that’s what I meant.” 

 

He was unsurprised to find Shikamaru smoking outside of the administrative building bored as ever. Shikamaru noticed their approach and switched his cigarette to his other hand, held it behind his hip in a lazy effort at politeness. “Hey.”

 

“Long day?” Kakashi guessed. 

 

“Kind of.” Shikamaru shuddered. “Sasuke’s back.” 

 

A glint flashed in Kakashi’s eyes. “What fun.” 

 

“It’s terrible,” Shikamaru groused. “You really don’t want to go up there. I can’t stand it.” 

 

“How so?” Gai asked, oblivious. “Sasuke’s presence is a rare gift indeed. Not only that - a reunion between lovers is cause for celebration.” 

 

“Huh.” Shrewdly, Shikamaru appraised him. “You haven’t seen them in action, have you?” 

 

“I’ve seen them in plenty of action,” Gai replied. “They fight together almost as well as Kakashi and I.” 

 

Shikamaru declined to enlighten him and took a drag off his cigarette. “See for yourself then.” 

 

“I will!” Determined, Gai started up the building’s ramp. 

 

Kakashi hung back for a second. “You don’t get paid enough.”

 

“Tell me about it - sometimes I wish you were still around.” 

 

“That bad, huh?” 

 

“You have no idea.” Shikamaru jerked his thumb in the direction Gai went off. “You’d better catch up with him before he gets there.” 

 

“You aren’t going to come?” 

 

“Nah. I’ll hear it from down here.” 

 

Kakashi clapped Shikamaru’s shoulder. “I miss you.” 

 

Shikamaru exhaled a cloud of smoke directly into his face. “I miss you too, you crumby old man.” 

 

“I forgot how delightful your company is. Come for dinner sometime.” 

 

“Sounds like a drag,” Shikamaru sighed. “But I’ll see what I can do.”

 

The administrative building had a new elevator put in during Kakashi’s term, partly to accommodate Gai and other wounded veterans, and partly to stop Shikamaru’s incessant complaints about the stairs. Kakashi circumvented it, however, and found Gai in between the second and third floor, walking on his hands.

 

“They’ve got a lift just for you,” he needlessly reminded. 

 

Gai lowered his head, looking at Kakashi upside down. “But this is more fun!” 

 

“Let’s hurry up then, before Sasuke bounces out. He’s all skittish.” 

 

Gai quickened his pace and bounded up the rest of the staircase. He flipped forward at the last step and landed smoothly. Kakashi fell in step beside him, and they headed to Naruto’s door. 

 

Naruto yanked the door open before they could knock. His face was flush, robes in disarray. “What are you doing here!?” Sasuke, who most likely alerted Naruto of their presence, calmly watched their exchange over his shoulder. 

 

“Why, I just wanted to pay my favorite successor a visit,” Kakashi said. “Then I heard Sasuke had returned - even better!” 

 

Naruto’s eyes narrowed. “You’re just trying to mess with me! Cut it out! I’m a real serious politician, you know - I got stuff to do!” 

 

Before Kakashi could insinuate an innuendo, Gai beat him to it, albeit unknowingly. “Does it involve Sasuke?” he asked innocently. “We can leave, if you’re too busy.” 

 

Kakashi doubled over with laughter at the look on Naruto’s face and had to support himself on the back of Gai’s wheelchair. 

 

Naruto growled - then slammed the door shut. 

 

Gai blinked. “Did I say something wrong?” 

 

“No, no, no,” Kakashi gasped. “Oh, man.” He straightened and forced himself to quiet down. “I love you, Gai.” 

 

Gai’s confusion diffused into a bright smile. “I love you too!” 

 

“I want a re-do,” Naruto called from inside the office. After a pause, he said, “Come in!” 

 

Kakashi opened the door and strolled inside. 

 

“Oh, hello,” Naruto exclaimed, sitting at his desk. Sasuke stood next to him, unaffected. “Look who it is! What brings you two here on this fine day?” 

 

“Nothing, nothing,” Kakashi said. “Just in the neighborhood.” 

 

Gai furrowed his brow. “Really, we only wanted to stop by to say hello. We can leave, if you were in the middle of something - “ Kakashi exploded in another fit of laughter, and Gai whirled to him. “Stop it!” 

 

Naruto pressed on as if Gai hadn’t said anything. “Wow! What a pleasant surprise!” He turned to Sasuke. “Can you believe it?” 

 

Sasuke disregarded Naruto’s question, and stared at his teacher coldly. “I was just finishing my report.” 

 

“I’m sure you were,” Kakashi assented. He dropped the act. As their sensei he was obligated to needle them, but also keep tabs on more serious matters. “Anything important?” 

 

“No,” Sasuke answered, recognizing Kakashi was done being an annoyance. “Suspicious activity’s at an all time low. The old leads have been dealt with and there aren’t any new complications to worry about.” He glanced at Naruto and his expression softened by the slightest degree. “Looks like your peace and prosperity is working. For now.” 

 

Naruto punched his side. “Don’t be such a pessimist! We saved the world already if you remember. You can drop your guard a little bit.” 

 

“Never.”

 

Gai clapped, smiling brightly. “But he’s right, Sasuke! This is great news. It means you’ll be around more often, correct?” 

 

Kakashi stiffened. Gai’s obliviousness got them into hilarious situations, but also awkward ones. He observed Sasuke closely. Naruto did so as well, anxiously awaiting his response. 

 

“Well,” Sasuke said, uncomfortable at being put on the spot. “Someone still needs to go out and keep an eye on everything…”

 

“Bullshit,” Naruto said. “We’ve got an actual intelligence unit for that. Stop making excuses, bastard.” 

 

“It’s not an excuse,” Sasuke snapped. He slammed his hand on the desk and leaned into Naruto’s space - some things never changed. “I remember saving the world, alright,  _ and _ what it cost. I’m not going to let it slip away just because you’re lonely - or - or whatever!” 

 

Gai looked at Kakashi worriedly. Kakashi only sighed to himself. 

 

Naruto’s face scrunched in anger as he shoved Sasuke away. “You’re such a fucking asshole!” 

 

Realizing his mistake, Sasuke moved back toward him. “Wait - I didn’t mean that. Naruto, listen - ” 

 

“No!” Naruto vaulted from his seat. Enraged and indignant, he jabbed Sasuke in the chest with an artificial finger. Sasuke looked down at his prosthetic; its existence implied a plethora of conflict and pain. 

 

“You listen to me,” Naruto demanded. “People are calling you the  _ Shadow Hokage _ , did you know that? You’re like a fucking ghost. You keep saying you’re doing all this for me, but if you really cared you’d actually show your face around here! I don’t need you - “ he huffed, searching for the appropriate word “ - gallivanting around in secret! I need you here.” His expression and posture deflated, and he thumped Sasuke’s chest again. “With me.” 

 

Kakashi had been expecting a show but not dramatics such as this. It was both extremely riveting and disturbing to watch. He felt like an intruder and wished he’d never come up in the first place. As usual Shikamaru had been correct and he should’ve listened. 

 

“We should leave, I think,” Gai whispered to him. 

 

Naruto pointed at them. “You’re staying! I need someone to witness this.” 

 

“Witness what?” Kakashi asked, not looking forward to the answer.

 

Naruto smirked at Sasuke, who had taken on the stature of a reprimanded puppy. “Sasuke’s apology.” 

 

Sasuke’s jaw clenched. “I’m sorry,” he muttered, the words forced out of him. 

 

“What was that?” Naruto cupped his ear. “I couldn’t hear you.” 

 

“I’m sorry,” Sasuke repeated, louder this time. 

 

“That’s it?”  

 

“Naruto,” Sasuke warned. His eyes darted to Kakashi and Gai, then back again. “Can’t we do this some other time?” 

 

“Nope.” Naruto sat down on top of his desk. “I’m the Hokage! I’ll make everybody wait here all day.” 

 

“You can’t do that,” Kakashi said. 

 

“Yes,” Gai agreed, “isn’t this a bit much?” 

 

“Hey!” Naruto turned his Hokage glare onto them. “You’re staying. I want this branded into Sasuke’s memory. He needs to be humiliated.”

 

Sasuke groaned. “I already am, trust me.” 

 

“It’s not good enough,” Naruto countered. “Come on, let me hear it! Get on your knees, if you have to.” 

 

“Please don’t,” Kakashi begged, not wanting that particular sight branded into  _ his _ memory. 

 

Sasuke scoffed. He did not get on his knees. Instead, he faced Naruto with the scant amount of leverage on this conversation he had left. “I’m sorry,” he said for the third time. “I’ve been...distant,” he admitted. “I needed space. But it became too much space. I knew it bothered you, and that it only made things worse. Obviously.” 

 

“Obviously,” Naruto echoed. 

 

“So I kept busy,” Sasuke continued, “supported you from afar, to make up for my absence. But things are different now. Everywhere I go, people are happy, safe, satisfied. There world is changing, just like you wanted it to. I kept waiting for something to happen. Something to justify my avoidance. Except nothing happened, and I ran out of excuses. You’re right. Is that what you wanted to hear?” 

 

Naruto tisked. He looked out the window at the sprawling view of Konoha. “I don’t know what I want from you anymore.” 

 

Sasuke frowned. The atmosphere shifted. He swept in front of Naruto like Kakashi and Gai weren’t present. “It sounds like you know what you  _ don’t _ want from me. Just tell me that. You’re not as stupid as you used to be, Naruto. It’s a simple process of elimination.” 

 

Kakashi suspected he could slip away unnoticed at this point, but felt rooted to the spot. A quick glance at Gai confirmed he was equally enraptured. 

 

Naruto shrugged. He no longer looked like a Hokage; he looked like a sad young man. “I don’t want you to be gone all the time. I don’t want everything to just be business between us. I don’t want you to feel like you can’t talk to me - or, hell, even Sakura, for that matter. You’re finally back, Sasuke, but you haven’t let anyone back  _ in _ . Let it happen already. “

“I can’t,” Sasuke said. “You’re the  _ Hokage _ , idiot. I’m not going to screw that up.” 

 

“Screw it up!?” Naruto flared, sadness evaporated by heated anger. “ _ You’re _ the idiot, you idiot! What the hell are you even talking about?” 

 

Sasuke inched closer, gaze intent. “I’m not exactly up to par. I was a wanted criminal for years. I’m barely here now. People are still suspicious of me, and they have a right to be.” 

 

“I don’t care about any of that,” Naruto said. “It’s over. It’s done. The world’s changing, like you said. Give me a little credit here, Sasuke. You think you’re such a martyr or something - you’re just scared, aren’t you? Nothing’s going to get better if you don’t stick around to  _ make _ it better, you - you asinine, moronic prick!”

 

Sasuke’s face blanked at Naruto’s concluding insult. He didn’t immediately respond. Kakashi wondered if he was as shocked as himself at Naruto’s expanded vocabulary. 

 

Naruto lifted his hand - Sasuke flinched; Gai’s lips parted and he made a small, wounded sound. But Naruto only brushed Sasuke’s long hair behind his ear, revealing his amethyst Rinnegan. Which fixated on Kakashi and Gai. 

 

“Can they go now?” Sasuke asked. 

 

“Huh?” Naruto turned around, but did not stop cradling the side of Sasuke’s head. “Oh. Sorry. I forgot you guys were here, to be honest.” 

 

“We’ll see ourselves out,” Kakashi said. “Gai?” 

 

Gai jolted. He wiped his eyes - had he seriously been tearing up? - and nodded an affirmative. 

 

He barreled out of the room and elected to take the elevator, to Kakashi’s surprise. The doors slid shut and they were ensconced in silence punctuated only by the elevator’s soft dings. 

 

Kakashi looked down at Gai. No matter how wild it got in the moment, he’d been generally desensitized to his students’ show of emotional stupidity - he knew they’d figure it out eventually, like they always did - but it must’ve been a lot to handle for an outsider like Gai. “You okay?” 

 

Gai sniffed and held onto Kakashi’s hand. “The eye of young love’s storm… I have not encountered it in awhile.” 

 

“What?” Kakashi frowned. “You mean as in us? We weren’t that dramatic.” 

 

“Kakashi.” Gai sent him a withering look. “You were very theatrical.” 

 

“Me? Look at yourself!”

 

“Regardless - I didn’t know Sasuke and Naruto were so…” 

 

“Complicated?” Kakashi supplemented.

 

“Enamored,” Gai decided. “Clearly they are completely devoted to one another.” 

 

“Come on, that’s been obvious for years. Naruto would’ve died for Sasuke even back when they were genin.”

 

Gai squeezed his hand. “A sentiment I can relate to.” 

 

Kakashi had nothing to say to that. 

 

The elevator opened. Shikamaru stood on its other side. He pointedly looked between them. “Is something going on?” 

 

Smoothly, Gai let go of Kakashi and smiled as if he hadn’t been on the brink of tears. “Not at all! We were just leaving.” 

 

“Okay,” Shikamaru said, though he plainly didn’t believe it. “Does that mean the coast is clear?” 

 

Kakashi glided past him. “I recommended you evacuate the building. And ask for that pay raise.” 

 

They left Shikamaru alone to bemoan his existence. As they came outside Kakashi squinted, the sun bright above them. 

 

“What time is it?” Gai asked. 

 

Kakashi checked his invisible watch again. “Probably around twelve.” 

 

“Aha!” Focused back on their challenge, Gai animated once more. “We need to go to the gates! Lee might be early, for all you know!” 

 

“Oh yeah,” Kakashi said. He’d nearly forgotten. “I doubt it.” 

 

“Do not doubt Lee! He’s got a knack for proving people wrong.” 

 

“Just because you’re his sensei doesn’t mean you’re excluded from that.”

 

“It most certainly does, Rival! He would never let me down!” 

 

Kakashi wordlessly followed Gai through the village. As expected, Konoha’s lunchtime rush was at its height. The village’s growing populace crammed the bustling streets as people met up at restaurants and street vendors. Despite not carrying any cash, Kakashi obtained himself and Gai each a midday snack at a taiyaki stand - being a former Hokage warranted him an unspoken credit system, so to speak. 

 

They sat down at a tree near the village’s western gate and contendly ate their modest lunch. Gai never stopped talking, but had moved onto general conversation topics. The nice thing about him was he could carry on for hours, and all Kakashi had to do was listen. Occasionally he wiped off flakes of fried batter from the corner of Gai’s mouth, but otherwise kept his hands and thoughts to himself. 

 

Gai laid down in the grass after they finished eating, leaf-dappled sunlight falling across his face. Beside him, Kakashi retrieved his well-worn copy of  _ Icha Icha Paradise _ from his pocket.

 

“Seriously?” Gai asked. 

 

“I don’t go anywhere without it,” Kakashi said, legs pulled up to his chest with the book resting on his knees. “You know that.” 

 

The novel’s spine was creased to fading, the page corners were frayed and curling, and the front and back covers had been taped up multiple times. The book helped him survive Team 7 practices, several council meetings, and even a kunai to the chest, back in the days when he kept it tucked into his jounin vest on missions. 

 

“You’ve only read it a thousand times,” Gai grumbled. 

 

Kakashi had suspected for a long time that Gai was jealous of his literary fascination. “And I like it better each time,” he stated simply. “Keep an eye out for Lee.” 

 

Remembering his objective, Gai propped his chin in his hand and resolutely watched the gate. 

 

Kakashi got through five chapters before he looked up. His invisible watch told him it was almost two o’clock. “Face it, Gai. He’s late.” 

 

“I hate to admit it…” Gai didn’t finish the sentence, dejected. He sat up and brushed strands of grass from his hair. “I wonder what’s keeping him.” 

 

“More like who,” Kakashi quipped. 

 

“Come off it!” Gai snatched  _ Icha Icha  _ from his hands and dangled it over his head, barring his neck with one arm. “Do not speak of my student in such a manner!” 

 

Kakashi wheezed - Gai was crushing his windpipe. “Alright, alright!” He fumbled for the book. Gai allowed him to take it, then he rolled away and gasped for air. “Damn, I’m sorry!” 

 

“No you aren’t,” Gai said, but he was smiling. 

 

Kakashi smiled back.

 

All of a sudden the gate creaked open. Gai whipped his head toward the noise. 

 

Lee stepped into the village, harried and sunburnt but otherwise in top form. He beamed upon seeing Kakashi and Gai. “Sensei!” 

 

“Rock Lee!  _ Ack _ \- ” Gai had scrambled to his feet, but immediately buckled under his own weight.  Sometimes he forgot about his leg in his excitement. 

 

“Damn it, Gai.” Kakashi bodily shoved him into his wheelchair. “Watch it!” 

 

“I’m fine!” Gai pushed Kakashi out of the way and opened his arms. 

 

Lee dropped his pack to accept the bone crushing hug. “I’m so happy to see you!” He leaned back but did not break the embrace; clinging grains of sand rained down between them. “I hope you weren’t waiting long!” 

 

_ Two hours _ , Kakashi thought.

 

“It wasn’t a problem,” Gai ensured. He patted Lee’s special armband, which signified his status as Konoha’s official Sunagakure ambassador; Kakashi appointed the jounin himself, on account of his historied friendship with Gaara. Lee spent weeks going back and forth between villages. Eventually Kakashi knew he’d move there full time, if not for his job then to be with Gaara, whom he theorized Lee had grown even closer to in their time working together. He was not looking forward to it - Gai would be inconsolable. 

 

“How did everything go?” Gai asked. 

 

Lee blossomed with joy. He always did when recounting his trips to Suna. “Just fine! The sun was relentless as always. I finally gave up training in the afternoons - I passed out this last time and didn’t hear the end of it. But that’s okay! I’ve found that the frigid nights are much better for exercise.” 

 

“That’s my pupil, adaptable as always!” Gai ruffled Lee’s hair. “And what of your diplomatic duties?” 

 

“Same old, same old,” Lee responded amicably. “Gaara and I are getting more efficient at collaborating. We’re so good, in fact, we’ve been finishing our workload early. He’s been showing me the desert around Suna. Did you know lizards rent burrows made by other animals? And during the day, we found entire families of them sunbathing on cliffsides. It was unlike anything I’ve ever seen before!” 

 

“That’s sounds fascinating!” 

 

Kakashi took this opportunity to edge into the discussion, before Lee could extrapolate further on reptilian habits. “There wasn’t any trouble that postponed your return, I hope?” 

 

“Oh!” Lee exited Gai’s hold and bowed deeply with all the seriousness of his honorable personality. “Forgive me for not immediately greeting you, Rokudaime!” 

 

Kakashi scratched his head. “Lee, I keep telling you, you can just call me Kakashi.” Lee remained bowing, and Kakashi sighed. “You can stand, too.” 

 

Lee rose. “I am touched by your friendly gesture, but as a previous Hokage you deserve only the most formal salutations!”  

 

He was so adamantly respectful Kakashi knew there would be no convincing him, and let it pass. “Anyway?”

 

Lee’s poise faltered. He took a moment to re-shoulder his pack and fussed with its straps. “There wasn’t any trouble,” he said, face schooled to unconvincing neutrality.  

 

“Then what was the hold up?” Kakashi pressed. 

 

Gai rolled his eyes. “Who cares! The only thing that matters is you are safe,” he said to Lee. 

 

Kakashi whacked his arm with  _ Icha Icha _ . “Don’t undermine my authority.”

 

Lee stepped between them before their dispute escalated. “Please, don’t argue! I have something to say.” 

 

Halfway to another disparaging remark, Gai’s mouth snapped shut. Intrigued, Kakashi moved to his side so they were both facing Lee. 

 

“The problem was I actually left Sunagakure later than scheduled, because, well...” Lee flushed as he trailed off. “Um…”

 

Cognizant of Lee’s hesitance, Gai solemnly appraised his student. “You know that you can tell us anything.”

 

“Okay…” Lee gripped the straps of his pack, firmed his stance, and sharply inhaled. “Gaara took me on a date,” he blurted out.

 

“Oh.” Flabbergasted, Gai looked at Kakashi, then back at Lee. “Oh! This is wonderful!” 

 

Kakashi grinned, totally unsurprised. “Good for you, kid.”

 

“Gaara visited me this morning bright and early,” Lee explained. “He took the day off because I’d be leaving. We had breakfast then went out to the desert again.” 

 

“Chase anymore lizards?”

 

“No,” Lee said, smiling, “we only talked. For hours. I thought that would be all, until Gaara made sure I knew his intentions. I just thought he was being a good friend! But then he told me,” Lee’s face flattened, and he spoke gruffly, “‘Lee, this is a date, you know that right?’” His expression brightened again. “He thought he was doing a bad job! I had no clue. After that, well, I lost track of time. I guess you could say we are official!” 

 

“That’s fantastic news,” Gai celebrated. “But I think you might’ve taken your job too seriously,” he joked.

 

Taking the jibe at surface value, Lee gasped. “Really? Is there a conflict of interest now? I don’t want to give up my post!” 

 

“Don’t worry,” Kakashi said. “It’d have to go through Naruto. He wouldn’t make you do that.” 

 

Lee drooped with relief. Just as began to speak again, a boisterous shout was projected at them from down the street - “Hey, Lee! Where the hell have you been?” 

 

They all turned to find Naruto jogging toward them. “Speaking of,” Kakashi muttered. 

 

Naruto stopped in front of Lee and wiped his brow. “About time you showed up. I came down to ask the guards if they’d heard anything from you.” 

 

“Hokage-sama!” Lee saluted him. “I apologize for my delay! I would’ve headed to your office right away, but Gai-sensei and the Rokudaime were waiting for me!”  

 

Naruto glared at Gai and Kakashi. “What’s with you two? Stop screwing up my day!” 

 

In a rare show of opposition to a superior (though, Hokage or not, Kakashi would never regard Naruto as superior to either of them), Gai lifted his chin. “I simply wanted to greet my student upon his return,” he defended.

 

Kakashi told Naruto the truth. “We had a score to settle.”  

 

Naruto glowered at him. “What?” 

 

At the same time, Lee finally dropped his salute and looked at his sensei confusedly. “What?” 

 

“Don’t worry about it,” Kakashi dismissed. “All that matters is I won. Again.” 

 

“Oh, rub it in, Rival,” Gai huffed. He pivoted and began wheeling away. “We need to go back home. Those genin you enslaved are probably there already!” 

 

“You’re such a sore loser,” Kakashi goaded, jogging after him. Gai increased his speed and he struggled to catch up - leaving Naruto and Lee stunned and bewildered. “Hey - slow down!” 

 

Konoha’s streets had thinned out, but this only left room for Gai to zigzag around and take sharp turns to throw Kakashi off of his route. Gai masked his chakra and went at top-speed, a green metallic blur. Kakashi had trouble following even when he jumped to the rooftops, and distantly longed for Obito’s Sharingan. 

 

He landed in front of their home and briefly searched his surroundings. Gai definitely beat him there but was nowhere in sight. 

 

“Dynamic Action!!!” 

 

Out of thin air Gai launched forward with a barrage of punches. Unable to dodge the attack, Kakashi raised his forearms to block - his feet gouged lines into the dirt as the power of Gai’s assault forced him backward. 

 

Pleased by this, Gai relented, his wheelchair creaking as he stilled, and Kakashi dropped his arms. Dust settled around them. 

 

“You’re too slow,” Gai said. 

 

“You’re a jackass,” Kakashi replied.

 

Gai smacked him lightly. “Watch your language - we have company!” 

 

“I’ll say whatever the hell I damn well please,” Kakashi declared, and went ahead of Gai. 

 

Sure enough, three kids were tottering around their roof. He circumvented the house to join their sensei in the backyard. A familiar redheaded jounin stood underneath the porch eaves, hands on her hips as she barked orders at the genin above. 

 

Kakashi sat down on the edge of the porch. The jounin relaxed her authoritative attitude and smiled at his appearance. 

 

“Kakashi-san! I was wondering when you’d get here. We’re almost done.” 

 

“Moegi,” Kakashi nodded. “Those are your brats?” 

 

“Yup,” Moegi confirmed. “We got lucky - just happened upon the mission desk when we heard about your request. First come first serve, you know. Once the other teams hear we got to help out the Rokudaime and the greatest taijutsu master of all time - oh, boy!” She cackled and dropped next to him. “Konohamaru’s gonna be so jealous!” 

 

“Make sure Gai knows,” Kakashi said. “He thought it’d be some huge bother.” 

 

“Are you kidding? My students totally freaked out. This is a big deal for them.” 

 

Kakashi hummed wordlessly and leaned back on his elbows. Running around the village talking to people was not usually part of his retirement schedule - it felt nice to be back home, and Moegi’s presence was minimally irritating. She’d grown from a blushing maiden into a capable jounin, and out of all her peers he enjoyed her company the most. She accompanied him on several missions while he was Hokage until she became a sensei. Her first team passed their chuunin exam with flying colors, and he assumed this current batch would too after some breaking in. 

 

“They’re good kids,” she said after an extended pause. They both looked out at the backyard slightly overgrown, dotted with holes Kakashi’s ninken had dug up. The genin bickered from above as they hammered fresh shingles over the installed roof patch, and Moegi lowered her voice. “But - and I hate to say it - there’s nothing that stands out about them. Do you know what I mean?” 

 

“Sure,” Kakashi said.

 

“They work hard,” she continued. “They’re smart, they’re talented. But it’s just not the same. All this peacetime stuff… Don’t get me wrong, I love it. But the kids lack a certain kind of grit I guess. They just don’t need it anymore.” She traced a whorling knot in the porch’s wooden boards. “I don’t know. It’s different in a good way. But it makes me nervous.”

 

“Learning how to be a shinobi in peacetime is a lot different than learning in the middle of a war.” Kakashi turned away from the swaying grasses to fix Moegi with a stern gaze. Gai called it his old man face, Shikamaru dubbed it the Hokage stare, and his students knew it precipitated a lecture. “But like you said, they’ve got all the right components. If something happens they’ll be forced to rise to the challenge. It’s your job to prepare them the best you can. The rest is up to them.” 

 

“Huh.” Moegi considered his words with a concerted frown. “I suppose so.” 

 

“Don’t worry about it,” Kakashi advised. “They’ll surprise you, believe me. Besides…” He sat up and stretched his arms languidly, the moment broken. “Just wait until the generation before yours has kids. With little Uzumakis and Uchihas running around - hell, the next Ino-Shika-Cho - things will get interesting, no doubt.” 

 

Moegi laughed. “That’s kind of scary to think about. I don’t know if Konoha’s ready!” 

 

“Hopefully it’ll be awhile, after I’m a senile old fart.” 

 

She grinned and bumped his shoulder with her own. “You’d never get senile, Rokudaime. You’re too stubborn and Gai would never allow it. Where is your better half, anyway?” 

 

“I don’t know. He was right behind me.” Kakashi glanced around. There wasn’t any movement that disturbed the yard, but he knew better than to rely on the obvious when Gai was concerned. “Maybe he’s planning another surprise attack.” 

 

Moegi shook her head. “You two are gonna be one-upping each other until the day you die.” 

 

“Probably.” Memories of the Eighth Gate bubbled to the forefront of Kakashi’s memory. He was already familiar with the prospect of Gai’s death and didn’t want to be confronted with it again anytime soon. “I hope we go out together,” he mused - neither of them would survive otherwise.

 

As if summoned by his ebbing mood, Gai blasted onto the porch through one of the sliding screens. “Hell-ooo!” He halted and beamed at Moegi upon noticing her presence. “I should’ve known you’d be the one to answer our call!” 

 

Moegi returned his smile. “Hey! We were just talking about you.” 

 

“Only good things, I hope.” Gai picked up the tray of lemonade he’d been balancing on his lap. “Please forgive Kakashi’s inhospitable manners. I took it upon myself to make refreshments for your students!” 

 

“Aw, thanks!” Moegi slid off the porch and yelled up at the genin. “Yo guys! Take a load off for a sec!” 

 

Three heads popped over the eaves. Two boys and one girl between them - who appeared to be the ringleader, judging by her determined expression. “But we’re almost done,” she protested. 

 

“Give it a rest,” the boy to her left said. “I’m dying.” 

 

“Me too,” the boy to her right seconded. 

 

“Just get down here,” Moegi commanded. “The Rokudaime and Gai-san have arrived.”

 

They immediately hopped down to the yard. The boys stared at Kakashi and Gai in awe as their female teammate bowed politely. 

 

“Hi,” Kakashi greeted. 

 

The girl squeaked, her head snapping up. “Hello!” 

 

One of the boys noticed Gai’s boon and vaulted onto the porch. “Sweet - lemonade!” 

 

Gai laughed heartily and handed him a glass. “There you go! You deserve it after all that hard work.” He addressed the other two genin. “Would you like some?” 

 

“I couldn’t,” the girl denied, “really, it’s fine!” 

 

Her teammate rolled his eyes and accepted the drink. “Suit yourself.” 

 

The girl stayed still, and Gai softened. He leaned forward and extended the last cup toward her. “I made it just for you. You don’t want to hurt my feelings, do you?” 

 

“No! Not at all!” She took the lemonade in both hands, and shyly grinned. “Thank you.” 

 

“Of course!” Gai tucked the empty tray under his arm and flashed a peace sign. “Thank you for fixing my roof!” 

 

She blushed at his exuberant praise. “You’re welcome.”

 

The genin sat down to enjoy the break and Moegi joined them. They rested a few yards away from the porch - enough room to lay on their backs and give Kakashi and Gai plenty of space to talk without being eavesdropped by the literal eavesdroppers. 

 

Kakashi pouted at Gai. “Where’s my lemonade?” 

 

Gai slapped the tray over the back of his skull. “You get nothing!” 

 

“Ow!” Kakashi jolted forward with the force of the blow. He sat back up, scowling, and rubbed his head. “That hurt!” 

 

Gai lowered from his wheelchair. “You’ll survive.” He landed on the porch with a pronounced thump. 

 

Their sides brushed. “Three to zero,” Kakashi said just to push his buttons. 

 

He scowled. “I just can’t stand it when you’re being a know-it-all.” 

 

Kakashi squinted at him. “Why are you with me then?” 

 

Gai enigmatically returned the look. “I ask myself the same question every day.” 

 

“The answer,” said Kakashi, “is that I’m all you’ve got.” He watched Moegi’s team banter and wrestle in the grass, and the humorous air fell to aged contemplation. “We’re going to get left behind, you know.” 

 

Gai, who generally put a stop to Kakashi’s somber musings, didn’t say anything to quell him now, and followed his gaze. “What makes you think that?” 

 

“The world’s moving on. Plain and simple.”

 

“Then we’ll move right along with it,” Gai stated without fanfare. “Don’t be so cryptic.” 

 

“I’m not.” Kakashi gestured to the genin. “There’s just no catching up with them.”

 

“You sound like such an old man.” This was the greatest schism between them - Gai wanted to remain youthful forever, whereas Kakashi had always acted ahead of his years. “You’re very crotchety for your age.” 

 

Kakashi hummed noncommittally. “Maybe because we both should be dead. We’re ancient by shinobi standards.” 

 

“But standards are changing,” Gai pointed out. “And here you are talking yourself into an early grave.” 

 

“It’s not that,” Kakashi clarified. “I’m just saying our time is over. We’re done. All we can do now is sit back and watch, which I fully intend on doing.” He laid down, head cushioned in Gai’s lap, to illustrate the point. “See? It’s nice. You should try it sometime.” 

 

Gai smirked down at him ruefully. “Passivity may be in your nature, Rival, but not mine. I refuse.” 

 

“It’s a long shot,” Kakashi admitted. “But one of these days you’ll have to slow down.”

 

“Never!” 

 

Kakashi surrendered, not wanting Gai to make a scene in front of Moegi and her students, and prepared to take a nap just because he could. Gai was solid and strong underneath him, and he was tired. “Wake me up when they’re gone.” 

 

“You’re an awful host,” said Gai. Regardless, he ran his fingers through Kakashi’s hair, massaged the growing bump on the back of his head. “It is unbefitting of your rank.” 

 

“What rank?” Kakashi mumbled. At least he hadn’t gone inside and hid in bed. The thought crossed his mind, but it was too nice of a day to not spend it outside. Plus Gai would’ve been mad, and he didn’t want to jeopardize his eventual winnings. “As far as I’m concerned I don’t have any rank.”

 

“Oh, really?” Gai looked in the direction of the unseen Hokage Monument, where Kakashi was permanently etched into Konoha’s legacy. “History itself says otherwise.” 

 

Kakashi shrugged. “I’m trying not to put so much weight in the past.”

 

Gai offered no response - there wasn’t a point in rehashing the same counterarguments, not when they were both in a good mood. He gathered Kakashi close and let him pretend to sleep. 

 

Moegi noticed their conversation had wound to a close. She clapped her hands and stood up. “Alright, break time’s over,” she told her students. “Get back to work!” 

 

After some minor grumbling and inquisitive glances at Gai and Kakashi, the three genin jumped back onto the roof to finish their mission. 

 

Moegi deposited their empty glasses onto the porch. “They think you’re both super cool,” she said to Gai, and pointed at Kakashi. “Don’t let them figure out he’s a lame softy.”

 

Kakashi stirred, but didn’t move from Gai’s lap. This was his house, his porch, and his husband. What did it matter to anyone else? “I don’t care,” he said.

 

Gai rectified the remark on his behalf. “What my Rival means is that he is too cool to be swayed by the opinions of others. Let them think whatever they like!” 

 

“If you say so…” Moegi reclaimed her spot on the porch with a groan. “Man, I always took my sensei for granted - never again. These kids tire me out.” 

 

“That’s why I flunked mine - until I got the three demons, that is,” Kakashi said. “It’s too much work.” 

 

“Moegi isn’t as  _ lazy _ as you,” Gai protested, and sent her a dazzling smile. “The village’s tradition of mentorship is in good hands!” 

 

Kakashi snorted. “Too bad she isn’t as  _ crazy _ as you.” 

 

Moegi laughed as Gai flicked Kakashi in the face. He rolled away to avoid the next attack, but ended up falling off the porch and face-planted into the grass below. This sent Moegi into an even louder fit. Her students looked down at them, concerned. 

 

“Is everything okay?” the girl asked. 

 

Kakashi spit out a mouthful of grass. “Yup.” 

 

“What happened?” 

 

Gai grinned, raising a victorious fist. “You’ve just witnessed me best the legendary Rokudaime!”

 

“Not so fast, Gai.” Kakashi jumped to his feet, imprisoned Gai in a chokehold, and smiled up at the genin. “Now you’ve just witnessed me best the legendary Green Beast!” 

 

The kids looked to their sensei for guidance, but Moegi was on the ground clutching her stomach. “Too much,” she gasped, “you guys are too much!” 

 

“Weird,” one of the boys said. The female genin frowned, her high opinion of the two shinobi no doubt affected by their roughhousing. 

 

Kakashi noticed this and stilled. Gai wiggled in his arms, onto his trickery. “Rival, don’t - “ 

 

But Kakashi didn’t listen. He released Gai and, with a flicker of imperceptible movement, materialized behind the genin. 

 

“Boo.” 

 

They screamed and nearly fell off the roof, saved only by Kakashi’s quick reflexes as he snatched them back from toppling over the eaves. They regained their breath and stared at him with wide eyes.

 

“Lesson number one from Grandpa Rokudaime.” He lifted an index finger. “Don’t be deceived by your opponent’s actions, no matter how unassuming.” 

 

“Y-yes, sir!”

 

“Alright; you all done here?” He looked over his shoulder to examine their handiwork: the roof had been patched and reshingled skillfully. “Good job.” 

 

“Thank you, sir!” 

 

He waved them off. “Go on, then.” 

 

They nodded hurriedly and scampered off the roof. Moegi stood to meet them. The team and their sensei looked up at Kakashi - as did Gai, who was greatly disappointed. 

 

Moegi offered them both a flippant salute. “See ya later Gai-san, Kakashi-san.” She then prodded her students. “Don’t be rude - say goodbye!”

 

With new trepidation, each of the genin stepped forward to bid Kakashi farewell. They deferred to Gai less nervously. He laughed heartily and gave an impromptu monologue on Konoha’s sprouting youth, before Moegi cut in with thanks but insisted they really had to leave. 

 

Kakashi watched them walk back into the street underneath the darkening sky. Once they were gone he hung over the eaves upside down, directly in front of Gai. 

 

“You don’t scare me,” Gai said, but Kakashi could see the amusement hiding behind his stern disapproval. “Those poor children...” 

 

“It’s good to keep them on their toes,” Kakashi said.

 

“Yes, but you don’t need to terrorize them.” Gai reached up and tugged his shoulder; Kakashi allowed himself to be manhandled back into Gai’s lap with nothing but a soft grunt. 

 

All alone now, he could truly relax, and let his arm and leg dangle off the side of the porch as he waited for his next reprimand. 

 

But Gai only smiled, pretenses of exasperation discarded. “Grandpa Rokudaime, huh?” he asked.

 

Kakashi shrugged. “Might as well lean into it.”

 

“Does this mean you’ll bake them cookies? Recount stories of old?” 

 

“Nah, you already do that. I’ll be the scary one, all wizened and unapproachable.” 

 

“Then I fear the wisdom you’ll impart.” 

 

“Come on - “ Kakashi bit his lip to suppress a lewd grin. “I promise I’ll only lend them  _ Icha Icha  _ once they reach chuunin.”

 

“Rival!” 

 

He dodged the incoming attack but didn’t fall. He neatly popped onto his knees instead and wound his arms over Gai’s torso. “Gotcha.” 

 

Gai slumped in acceptance of his defeat. “There’s no stopping you, is there?” 

 

“So you’ve finally figured it out,” Kakashi murmured, nosing behind his ear. “My plan to debauch the entire village. Took you long enough.” 

 

“No, I’ve always known you were a dirty bastard.” Gai elbowed Kakashi off of him and climbed back into the wheelchair. Kakashi rested on his haunches, expecting Gai’s next proclamation - which Gai delivered with predictable gusto: “But don’t think I’ve given up yet! There’s still one last round to our challenge: Hisako-san’s air conditioner!”

 

“Ah, just in time for dinner too. I’ve missed her cooking.” Kakashi got to his feet and motioned for Gai to go ahead of him. “It’ll taste even better with my sweet, sweet victory.” 

 

Gai emphatically explained the reasons behind Kakashi’s stupidity as they entered the house. He didn’t notice when Kakashi ditched to their bedroom to change clothes - the entire village might’ve deserved less than his best, but Hisako-san was an exception to the rule; redressed in decommissioned jounin blues sans vest and hitai-ate, Kakashi resumed his stride behind Gai just as Gai passed through the front door, still talking. 

 

He’d missed most of Gai’s tangent but could predict its conclusion, and nodded along.  “Yeah, yeah, you’re totally right.”

 

Gai stopped at the foot of the porch ramp and tossed him an incredulous look. “Were you even listening?” 

 

Pace unceasing, Kakashi summarized: “I’m a huge idiot with a big mouth and bigger ego.”

 

Gai wheeled forward to regain his lead. “Yes you are, Rival! Where would you be without me to remind you of this crucial fact?”

 

“Dead in a ditch someplace,” Kakashi guessed.

 

“Correct again! Maybe you aren’t quite hopeless.” 

 

“Maybe.” 

 

It took less than a minute to cross the street and arrive at Hisako-san’s doorstep. A bullheaded civilian woman who held no patience for shinobi, Hisako-san had lived in the general area before Pein’s assault and painstakingly recounted every minute detail of her home to Yamato during the village’s reconstruction. She looked as old as Konoha itself and had lived through several wars which she never let anyone forget. She was a stone cold bitch, kept an eye on Gai since he moved in after the war and, by extension, tolerated Kakashi’s presence. She thought he was lazy, perverted, and a bad influence on Gai - claims which he couldn’t exactly dispute. 

 

Naturally, Kakashi liked her a lot. 

 

Gai knocked thrice. Sounds of blustered footsteps and muffled cursing followed, then Hisako-san opened the door. Her wrinkly face was stretched by a tight gray bun and set in a permanent scowl, framed by scraggly strands of hair. She ignored Kakashi altogether and glared at Gai. “It’s about time you showed up!” 

 

Gai ducked his head. “I am sorry, Hisako-san. We had some errands to run.” 

 

Errands was a strange way of putting it, Kakashi thought. Though he reasoned their challenges were just another facet of their everyday life, as simple as buying groceries. He watched Gai’s despondent obeisance with amusement. 

 

Hisako-san slapped her hand on the doorframe and stooped down to Gai’s level so she could shout in his face. “I don’t have the  _ lifespan _ to wait around for you.” She turned her wrath onto Kakashi next. “And you’ve still got this loser at your side, I see.” 

 

Kakashi touched his chest. “You wound me, Hisako-san.” 

 

Gai attempted to placate her. “Kakashi is the Rokudaime! He served our village well and is far from being a loser!”

 

Hisako-san continue to speak about him as if he weren’t there. “Listen to my words, boy. I can respect his title and still dislike him as a person. Which I do - a lot.”

 

“But - “ 

 

“No buts! I’m your elder, remember? Now get inside. There’s work to do.” 

 

Gai sighed. “Yes, ma’am.” 

 

Kakashi stayed on the doorstep while Gai wheeled past Hisako-san; his voice echoed back at them as he commented on the lovely state of Hisako-san’s house. Kakashi’s lips quirked, and Hisako-san stared at him, unmoving.

 

“How is everything?” she asked. 

 

Kakashi’s brow raised. “With what - Gai?”  

 

“Who else? I’ve barely seen him since you took off the hat.” 

 

His expression smoothed to mock seriousness. “I promise I’m not holding him hostage.”

 

Hisako-san’s eyes narrowed. This was as emotive as she’d get talking to Kakashi - he knew she was amused. “He must be happy to have you all to himself.” 

 

“You’d think so,” Kakashi said, trying to sound flippant about it. 

 

But nothing got past Hisako-san. She stepped outside and shut the door behind her; Kakashi had to stumble back so she wouldn’t smash his toes. The crown of her gray head only came up to his chest but that didn’t make her any less intimidating. Theoretically Kakashi knew he could overpower her but no amount of chakra would dispel that withering gaze. 

 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” she demanded. 

 

“Nothing,” Kakashi dismissed immediately. Cowed and cornered, he shuffled back some more then realized that constituted as running away and froze mid-step. “Hisako-san, you know that I adore you, but I really don’t feel comfortable - “  

 

“I said no buts! Don’t attempt to flatter me either. Our relationship works best when we both hate each other. Now,” she brandished her index finger, prepared to jab him, “is something going on with Gai?” 

 

“You know him.” Kakashi wilted by the slightest degree; Hisako-san didn’t think he had any dignity so there was none to lose around her. “I was hoping he’d slow down a little now that I’m home, but nothing’s changed. I think he missed the point.”

 

“He’s a smart kid,” Hisako-san said. 

 

“I didn’t say he wasn’t,” Kakashi frowned.

 

“Let me finish,” she continued, crossing her arms. “I’ve noticed he’s got a knack for denial. If he’s missing a point it’s on purpose. He can’t face the fact that you’re a slob or that he’s too hyperactive. It’s always sunshine and rainbows with that boy. If he thinks you’re raining on his parade he’ll just ignore everything you have to say. Even if it’s true.” 

 

Kakashi ruminated on her words for a bit. It was strange to hear such an accurate analysis of Gai’s personality that didn’t come from himself. If it was anyone besides Hisako-san, or maybe Lee, he’d feel threatened. Instead he merely said: “You’re right.” 

 

Hisako-san smirked. “I usually am.”

 

Before either of them could say anything else a loud shout sounded from inside the house. Hisako-san whirled around, but Kakashi was already pushing past her and entered without permission. “Gai?” he called. 

 

“Everything’s totally fine,” came Gai’s clipped voice. “Nothing’s wrong at all.”

 

“For some reason I don’t believe you,” Kakashi replied, striding down the hall. “Where the hell are you?” he asked; Hisako-san didn’t appreciate the use of shinobi techniques like openly detecting chakra signatures. 

 

“Definitely not in the living room,” Gai said, then realized his mistake. “Oh, damn!”

 

Kakashi snorted fondly. “Idiot.” 

 

“What was that, Rival?”

 

“Nothing, just hold tight. I’m coming to rescue you.” The layout of Hisako-san’s house was similar to their own and Kakashi navigated its halls without a problem. 

 

Hisako-san joined him in the living room doorway and they both paused to take in Gai’s current state. He wasn’t mortally wounded as Kakashi had feared - he grew paranoid about Gai’s wellbeing after the Eighth Gate, though he’d never admit it - but he was bent over in the wheelchair clutching his bad foot, tools and AC unit parts scattered around him. He kicked at the offending mechanism, which he must’ve dropped onto his bad foot. “Fuck!” 

 

“Whoa.” Kakashi chose that moment to sweep toward him - he rarely cursed, especially in the presence of anyone besides Kakashi himself. “Gai, you said everything was fine. You’re a liar.” 

 

“No I’m not,” Gai denied through gritted teeth. 

 

Kakashi bent down to take his foot in hand. Upon closer inspection he saw a tear in the bandages, from which blood began seeping. “The hell did you do?”

 

Gai jerked out of Kakashi’s grip. “Let go of me!” 

 

“Relax,” Kakashi snapped. He grabbed Gai’s ankle lightning-fast and looked up at Gai with a resolute glare, communicating that his care was non-negotiable if only because he knew Gai wouldn’t bother with it himself. “I’ll need to rewrap it anyway.” 

 

Gai stared at him for a moment, until averting his eyes with another curse.

 

“You two are always entertaining,” Hisako-san commented from the doorway without emotion. 

 

Gai straightened, just now alerted to her presence. “H-Hisako-san!” 

 

“Looks like you couldn’t manage the simple task of fixing my unit,” she went on, finally entering the room.

 

Kakashi was annoyed with her antics - Gai didn’t need more reason to be upset - but he wasn’t about to get in between whatever strange pseudo grandmother/grandchild relationship they had, and remained silent at Gai’s feet.

 

“But I only dropped something!” Gai thumped his chest with his fist. “I vow to you I can accomplish this task!” 

 

“Not with you bleeding like that all over my carpet!” Hisako-san pushed Kakashi out of the way, which he reluctantly allowed, and took the handles of Gai’s wheelchair. “C’mon, I’ll get you fixed up before you make a mess.”

 

“What?!” Gai blanched at her words and twisted around to yell at Kakashi as she pushed him out of the living room. “Save me from this madwoman!” 

 

Kakashi got up and, in a flash, wrested Gai from Hisako-san, sped down the hall, and barricaded himself and Gai behind the locked bathroom door. 

 

“Kakashi!” Hisako-san yelled from the other side. “What do you think you’re doing? This is my home!” 

 

“Exactly,” he said, keeping his hand on the doorknob, worried that Hisako-san would call upon the power of the old gods to wrench the entire door off its hinges, “which is why I’ll take care of Gai. We’re only your guests. Don’t worry about us.” 

 

He glanced at Gai for support, who had resumed his pout. Eventually, though, he sighed and said to their hostess: “It’s okay, Hisako-san. I appreciate your concern, but Kakashi is well acquainted with my medical care. Please. We do not want to take time away from your dinner preparations, either.”

 

“Oh, I see how it is,” she drawled. “You just want my food!” 

 

“Kind of,” Kakashi admitted. Gai lobbed a roll of toilet paper at him. He let it hit him square in the face, then said, “It’ll only be a few minutes. We’ll come help afterward.” 

 

“Alright, fine,” Hisako-san relented. Her voice drifted away as she walked toward the kitchen damning them and their ancestors. 

 

“Finally,” Kakashi mumbled once she was gone. He rummaged around the medicine cabinet for bandages; they’d have to do until he could fix Gai with a proper boot once they got home. Sakura showed him how ages ago and enjoyed the ritual of it all, despite Gai’s reservations. 

 

But this was not one of those times. Gai was in a mood, Hisako-san had a meager supply of bandages, and Kakashi was torn between concern and irritation. He sat on the edge of the bathtub and brought Gai’s foot into his lap. The red stain of blood had grown in size.

 

“I thought you didn’t want my help,” Kakashi murmured as he slowly unwound Gai’s soiled wrappings. Gai had been uncharacteristically quiet and inciting him to anger was better than dealing with his offputting silence. 

 

Gai did not rise to the bait. “That was before Hisako-san threatened to help me herself,” he said, voice low and grated. “I don’t want anyone to see -  _ this _ .” 

 

Kakashi finished with the old bandages. They fell to the floor in a bloody pile, revealing what remained of Gai’s leg. The attack on Madara shattered most of its bones, and what remained afterward was burnt away by the Eighth Gate itself. Gai had refused a prosthetic; most of his nerves were fried anyway, rendered fibromyalgic, so there was nothing to connect to. All that was left of his leg was a lumpy stump of scar tissue which came to a tapered bulb where his foot used to be. 

 

As usual, Gai avoided looking at it directly. When he did caution a glance, his face tightened with an unnamable discomfort. It was a mix of shame, grief, and pain, but never regret. Kakashi schooled himself to careful neutrality as always. 

 

He found the offending cut on the remainder of Gai’s foot - barely half an inch long, but bleeding profusely. Something in the way his leg stitched itself back together made it vulnerable to excessive bleeding. Kakashi’s fingers flared with rudimentary medical ninjutsu. He closed the small wound as best as he could, then set to rewrapping with Hisako-san’s bandages. 

 

His eyes flicked up to Gai’s in the middle of his ministrations. “You’re creeping me out - say something.” 

 

“What is there to say?” Gai asked coldly. Color arose on his face. “Are you going to force me to confess my embarrassment?” 

 

No confession was necessary, for it showed in the entirety of Gai’s taut frame. Kakashi didn’t have much patience to deal with it. He wrapped the bandages tighter than required, ignoring Gai’s pained hitch of breath. He was being cruel, but Gai’s stubbornness inspired his own. “You wouldn’t be embarrassed if you didn’t push yourself so hard.” 

 

“Oh, of  _ course _ ,” Gai intoned, “this is just about you proving a point!” 

 

“No,” Kakashi argued, “this is about  _ you _ proving a point to yourself. It’s stupid and reckless.” 

 

“Reckless? You’re acting like I’m going on missions! I was only trying to help one of our elderly neighbors - “ 

 

“Oh, shut up!” Kakashi let go of Gai’s leg to keep from squeezing it in an angry vice. “You don’t know a damn thing about  _ air conditioning units _ \- even if you weren’t disabled you wouldn’t have been able to fix it!” 

 

He said it. The  _ D word _ . Gai’s face settled into a scarily calm rage but Kakashi didn’t care. 

 

“It’s the truth,” he added. “You know it’s true, and there’s nothing wrong with it.” 

 

“I’m perfectly able of everything I was before,” Gai said. 

 

“You were ready to get on our  _ roof _ ,” Kakashi reminded him. “How could you pull that off?” 

 

“I would’ve found a way!” 

 

“Sakura told me about all your little mishaps back when I was Hokage,” Kakashi said, wanting to put an end to their senseless back and forth, and Gai wisely quieted. “I guess that explains all those times you never showed up for lunch and I had to worry what happened.” 

 

“It was never serious,” Gai insisted without much force. 

 

“It could have been. Don’t you get it? I know you’re mad - “ 

 

“You don’t know anything about how I feel.”

 

“Yes, I do.” Kakashi gently put his hands back on Gai’s newly bandaged leg. “I don’t know much, but I know better than anyone. And I know this isn’t like you, Gai.” Gai opened his mouth to protest, but Kakashi cut him off. “Not like that. I mean… Well, you’ve always been a little overboard. I expect that. But you’ve never been careless. You were always so conscious of your body. Now it’s like you’re trying to forget it’s even there.” 

 

Gai didn’t say anything for a moment. Kakashi watched his jaw clench and unclench until he asked, “Wouldn’t you?” 

 

“I don’t know,” Kakashi answered honestly. “Maybe. But I know if our roles were reversed you’d be doing what I’m doing now. Trying to help you get through this and come to your senses. You can’t keep doing this. It’s just not possible.” 

 

That’s what Gai hated to hear more than anything - that something was impossible. He rubbed his face with a shaking hand and slumped in his wheelchair, the fight drained out of him. “I really don’t want to do this right now, Kakashi.” 

 

“Then let’s go home,” Kakashi suggested. 

 

Gai looked at him. “But Hisako-san - “ 

 

“She’ll just blame it on me.” 

 

“But - “ 

 

Kakashi gathered the old bandages on the floor and held them over the bathtub. After a quick fire release he washed the ashes down the drain. “Go on,” he said over his shoulder. “I’ll be right behind you.” 

 

Gai miserably collected himself, unlocked the door, and exited the bathroom without a word. 

 

Kakashi went to the kitchen afterward. Hisako-san lifted her head, standing over a large pot on the stove. “Gai left?” she asked. 

 

“Yeah,” he confirmed. 

 

“You made him mad?” she questioned further. 

 

“Yeah,” he said again. 

 

She tsked, lowered her spoon, and picked up two boxes from the counter. “Here.” She shoved them into Kakashi’s hands. “Since that’s all you care about anyway.” 

 

“Oh.” Kakashi bowed shortly. “Thank you.” 

 

“Don’t start that crap.” Her beady eyes seemed to peer into his soul. Apparently satisfied, she tapped his masked cheek with her wooden spoon. “You’re not half bad.” 

 

Kakashi blinked, thoroughly confused. He was expecting judgement, not her approval. “Excuse me?” 

 

Hisako-san went back to the stove. “Gai is a good boy. A bit hardheaded. He won’t listen to me. But he listens to you.” 

 

“Not really,” Kakashi said. He had years of personal experience which proved otherwise. 

 

This meant nothing to Hisako-san. “You should hear the way he talks about you,” she continued. “It’s almost sickening.” 

 

Kakashi grinned. “So I’ve heard.” 

 

“And if only he saw the way you look at him,” she went on. “If you two could accomplish that, we’d be in the Pure Land already.” 

 

Something warm and terrible clawed at Kakashi’s chest. He never thought it’d come from Hisako-san, and said as much. “I thought you hated me.” 

 

“I couldn’t. Gai loves you. That’s something we agree on, is it not?” 

 

“It is,” he smiled. 

 

“Now get out of my house,” she ordered. 

 

“Yes, ma’am,” he replied, and did just that. 

 

When Kakashi got home he sensed Gai’s chakra on the back porch and slid the screen open. Gai was out of his wheelchair, sitting quietly against one of the porch’s columns, the yard laid out dark and silent before him. He did not turn around.

 

Kakashi discarded his mask entirely, tossed it on the table behind him without looking. “Hisako-san sent me back with food, so you won’t be missing out on her dinner at least.”

 

“I’m not hungry right now,” Gai responded. 

 

Kakashi nodded. “Okay.” Understanding Gai needed space, he took a step back. “I’ll be doing the dishes.” 

 

Gai didn’t say anything so Kakashi didn’t either. He shut the screen, stood for a second, then stowed Hisako-san’s parting gift in the fridge. 

 

By now the sky was a velvet purple. An evening breeze wafted in through the windows. Kakashi turned the radio on so Gai would know he couldn’t hear him cry or punch stuff or whatever he needed to do, and got to finishing the dishes. 

 

It’d been a long day, full of things to do which ultimately amounted to nothing. It was nice, though, in a way. After leaving office, Kakashi had turned into something of a hermit. He’d always been antisocial, so it was only natural that he’d need an extended amount of time to recover from being an elected official. It wasn’t as extreme as Tsunade’s sabbaticals, but same in concept. He’d forgotten how it felt to walk through the streets of Konoha, stop at food stands, interact with the villagers, badger his students, and catch up with other acquaintances he normally wouldn’t see. Enough time had passed since his retirement that the pressure of being Rokudaime wasn’t nearly as suffocating. 

 

Perhaps Gai was right. Kakashi couldn’t simply hide away for the rest of his life, detach himself from the future which he’d certainly laid the foundations for, willingly or not. But he also knew that he was right, too. Things had to change. They couldn’t participate with the same gumption they used to - not as shinobi, not as young men. They were too tired, world-weary, and damaged. Both of them needed to adapt and sacrifice their old coping mechanisms in the process. This wasn’t part of a challenge because there was no clear winner. It was about compromise, not competition. 

 

Kakashi carried on philosophizing. The dishes in the sink clinked together between his hands and the radio croned staticy songs. A peace settled over him, into his bones, domestic and purposeful. He spent his entire life protecting the village against threats. Once those threats had been eliminated, he served the village from its highest office. Similarly, Gai spent his entire life honing his body until the moment it became his ultimate weapon against Madara. And for what? 

 

For this, Kakashi realized. For the future, indistinct and unknowable. But they were living in it now. They paid their dues and now it was their time to cash in. A plate slipped from Kakashi’s fingers as he realized this would be his life until the day he died: enjoying every moment at Gai’s side without any obligations or responsibilities besides the ones they owed to each other. 

 

He wondered if Gai came to the same conclusion outside. He didn’t have to wait for long. Just as he finished filling the rack beside the sink and pulled the plug he heard the porch screen slide and shut. Kakashi watched the water drain, letting Gai come to him if he wanted to. 

 

The wheels on Gai’s chair bumped over the minute discrepancies in the wooden floor. He stopped behind Kakashi, wrapped his arms around Kakashi’s waist, and pressed his face into Kakashi’s back. 

 

Kakashi waited until he felt Gai’s breathing even out before turning around. He looked down and Gai looked up. Gai’s eyes were red, and Kakashi couldn’t deny the lump in his own throat. They were both stupid, sentimental old men. 

 

“Gai,” Kakashi began. 

 

But Gai didn’t want to hear it. “You won.”

 

Kakashi scratched his nails through Gai’s hair. The movement was familiar and calmed both of them. “I didn’t win anything. It was stupid to try and turn this into a challenge. It only made things worse. You don’t have anything to prove to me.” 

 

“I know,” Gai mumbled, his chin resting on Kakashi’s hip. “The problem is within myself.” 

 

“That makes two of us,” Kakashi smirked. It dropped within seconds, however. “I’ve been thinking.” 

 

“Me too,” Gai said. “But let’s save that for later. I’m tired.” 

 

“Yeah,” Kakashi whispered, “me too.” 

 

Gai smiled, like the day’s conflict could be so easily washed away. When it came to Gai, Kakashi knew anything was possible. He patted Kakashi’s side - imparting a lot of promise and affection with the simple touch - then rolled to the fridge. “Hisako-san’s delicious cooking beckons!”

 

Kakashi giggled. Gai started in his chair, turning to face him, and Kakashi blushed. “What?” he asked, self-conscious for reasons he’d never understand. They’d seen each other through thick and thin, life and death, youth and old age, and they still could reduce one another to boyish trepidation. 

 

“You’re just cute,” Gai told Kakashi. He retrieved Hisako-san’s food and closed the fridge. “Let’s say we be lazy, eat and watch TV?” 

 

“Sounds good,” Kakashi affirmed. 

 

He followed Gai into the living room. They laid on opposite ends of the couch and ate with chopsticks, dinner precariously balanced on their chests as they watched a cheesy romantic comedy Gai allowed Kakashi to pick upon surfing channels. Emptied boxes set aside once they finished eating, they slowly migrated to the middle of the sofa and tangled in a sleepy embrace. Kakashi kicked his pants off, relieved to be declothed yet again, and convinced Gai to lose the top of his jumpsuit so he could relish in his muscular build. 

 

But nothing happened beyond some kissing and heavy petting. Despite the morning’s gamble, it wasn’t that kind of night. That was just fine. They had all the time in the world and they could do whatever they wanted with it. 

 

Halfway through the movie, Gai shifted and regarded Kakashi fondly. “You’re staring at me.” 

 

“I am,” Kakashi freely admitted. 

 

“You picked this,” Gai said, “and I’m paying more attention than you are.” 

 

“It’s boring compared to you,” Kakashi said. 

 

Gai rolled his eyes. “Right.” 

 

“It’s true.” 

 

Gai laid flat on his back and held Kakashi against his chest. “Get a good look, then.” 

 

“I will,” Kakashi promised, and he did - and he would, for the rest of his life. 


End file.
